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Meller's Movie Forecast

Hello everyone and welcome back to Meller’s Weekly Movie forecast, where I’ll tell you exactly what great movies you need to see, as well as gird you against the waves of shit that are beating at the walls of my ivory tower.

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Before I give you the heads up on this week’s movies, it’s recap time. 

Movies I was right about:

Punisher: War Zone (I said: Skip It), Frost/Nixon (I said: See It)

Movies I was wrong about:

None, bitch.

Close Calls

Cadilliac Records – I said Skip it due to lack of originality, and while the critics agree, they say that the music almost makes it worth seeing. So if you’re a freak for Motown, I may have been wrong, but if you’re not, then you don’t need to see it.

Record:

Allright, so far it’s a 2-0-1. I was hoping for a ’72 Dolphins December, but what can you do. Pop that champagne Mercury Morris. You motherfucker.

Recap

The only good movie to come out so far has been Frost/Nixon, so it’s leading right now, but after this weekend, that’ll all change.

Up until now, I’ve been giving things either a "see it" or "skip it" but I’m going to add a third grade, in between the two: "check it out." Self explanatory, right? It’s for those gray areas.

This Week’s New Movies

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The Day the Earth Stood Still - God, if there’s one thing I hate, it’s shitty remakes. "Hey, here’s a classic movie. Let’s completely forget what made it a classic and do it all over again. But this time….CGI!!!!" It really pains me. The original <http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0043456/> was a watershed moment in filmmaking because it really took a step towards producing thought-provoking science fiction. Up until the 1951 movie, sci-fi was simply horrible creatures attacking. But after, everything was changed. Sci-Fi was an important tool to subtly attack the status quo. This movie just slaps some CGI bullshit and cheapens and alters the message. It’s so bad, and this time, don’t blame Keanu Reeves. Just blame Hollywood in general.

Verdict: Loathe It.

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Nothing Like the Holidays – I’m not even going to waste anyone’s time here. If you want an explanation, reference my notes on Four Christmases.

Verdict: Destroy it.

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Che - Okay, so this is one only for the true cinephiles out there. Che is both parts of Steven Soderbergh’s two-part biopic on Ernesto "Che" Guevara, aka That Guy on the D-Bag’s T-shirt. By all account, Che Guevara was not a good person, responsible for the murder of numerous people. He helped lead the communist revolution in Cuba, before failing to do the same in Bolivia. Soderbergh’s film clocks in at a lengthy 4 hours and 18 minutes, since it is two parts in one. Right now, Che is only playing in NY and LA, and it’s only being released now for awards consideration. However, I would recommend that you see both parts of Che at once. It only makes sense, right? The film itself is highly objective, and tries to paint the events as historical fact, which in modern times, is highly commendable. It is amazingly shot, and extraordinarily acted, so it really is something to be appreciated if you’re willing to give it a shot.

Verdict: See it, if you can tolerate the length.

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Doubt – Doubt is one of those movies that I’m sure will be good if I saw it, but I just can’t bring myself to watch it. You know those movies? If you don’t here’s your first example. Doubt is based off the multiple award winning play which tells the story of a nun who becomes convinced that a priest has abused a young black child. That’s it really. The story doesn’t progress much from there really. I don’t want to give away anything in case anyone sees it, but I read the play a while back, and didn’t really see what the big deal was. Sure, maybe this was an important story several years ago when all the stories about the pedophilic priests were in the news, but now it’s sadly old hat. The movie does have good people surrounding it however. It was written and directed by the author of the original play, and the main cast is played by Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Meryl Streep, and Amy Adams. So while I’m sure this will be a good movie, I just can’t fully recommend it.

Verdict: Check it out.

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Gran Torino  – Remember the Changeling? You know that Clint Eastwood movie that came out a few months ago. Well apparently Eastwood is one busy mothafucka, since he has another film that he directed coming out this week. And he’s acting in this one too. At 78, Eastwood is still busting his ass to crank out good movies, and Gran Torino doesn’t look to break the trend. Eastwood plays a Korean War veteran who saves his young neighbors life from a gang, and then sets out to clean up the streets of his town. Might Eastwood be a little too old to pull off the ass-kicking involved? No fucking way. This is going to rule.

Verdict: See it

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Timecrimes  – This brings me to my surprise pick of the week. Timecrimes is a Spanish sci-fi time travel movie set over the course of a day. It begins innocently enough: A man spots a nude woman in his woods, and follows her off to investigate. This, of course, leads him on a journey through time, leading him to earlier in the day, and really it might make your head hurt at the end of the film. But nevertheless, Timecrimes is a labyrinthine tale that deserves to be seen.

Verdict: See it

And that brings us to the close, thank god this review isn’t like Timecrimes, or I’d suddenly be stuck talking about Cadillac Records again, and then it would keep looping until my head exploded. This week brought some good movies, but next week looks even stronger, so check back in next Friday

 
 
 


 

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